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“Dark Rising”- A Review

Date: October 2007
Director: Andrew Cymek

Cross over films that span genres are probably some of the best films out there. When you think it’s a dark comedy about some guy writing a script and it turns into an intense drama with murder and drug smuggling. Or folks are running from the newly risen dead but are quirky enough to make you laugh as they deal with the once normal world turned sour. Dark Rising is a genre crosser but I’m not saying it was done in an agreeable manner.

A Man’s Ex and Her Coven Bring Trouble to Campout

Picture a Dolph Lundgren looking social outcast named Jason, hell-bent on getting back together with his ex-fiancé. He has a brilliant idea of re-kindling the flame by inviting her and two of her friends on a camping trip with his buddy who is obsessed with shooting phone sex line commercials. Unbeknownst to Jason, his ex is now a lesbian wannabe witch that is bringing her coven along to try to contact a “dead” girl. In order to make contact, the witches pick up a dangerous book from an old used bookstore against the warnings from the owner. They take the book, written in some ancient language, and can’t read the inscriptions correctly. Lucky for them, someone wrote out passages phonetically so they are able to open a portal to another dimension and unleash the horrors from beyond on Earth. Additional luck shines upon them when the portal brings an axe wielding demon slayer in a hot little outfit.

This film basically was “Scooby Doo” without the dog and the masked man. You’ve got a smart girl deciphering a book, a fighting bad-ass chick, an oblivious guy making up the plans, and the idiot as bait. This film attempts to take the best parts and lines from “The Evil Dead,” add in an outfit like Angela from “Spawn,” and sprinkle on the topless women making out. I honestly had no real complaints with any of this because it really seemed like they were doing it and doing it poorly on purpose. Like they had a budget and said “lets blow it all on the monsters and we’ll deal with the rest later.”

Demons And Other Horrors Abound in “Dark Rising”

A few things really came to the surface with this one that seems to resonate through the ages. If you purchase an old book in an ancient language, read it to yourself. Time and time again we see demons unnecessarily being pulled into our world by unsuspecting teens who are just looking for a good time. If someone is bitten by a big scary thing in the woods, they themselves will probably end up being scary and try to rip your face off. The best way to get over your dying girlfriend is to have a hot chick in a bra and panties hit on you, although it probably still stings when you show up and she’s banging your best friend.

This one is shot on low end cameras, chock full of campy line goodness, and ready for that Halloween party you’re planning for next year. Add in jello shots and a keg and this should increase the enjoyability of “Dark Rising.” Just remember to bring your axe.

2.5 blood drops

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Published on: April 5, 2012

Filled Under: Horror Movie Reviews

Views: 1615

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